You're the only song I want to hear.

so I am not sure why I am writing about this. but whatever. so remember back at the beginning of February how I was talking to that guy from tumblr? well today he posted that he was lonely so i went on MSN and of course he was on so i started talking to him. he is not doing too well. his father beats him. his father hit him with a wooden plank and cracked two of his ribs. just because his father doesn't like him. and i know that whole thing, don't believe what everyone tells you especially on the internet, but i believe him. and what sucks even more is that he sings in a band so he can barely breath and he has a gig on Friday, which is why he told me because I asked if he was excited for his gig. No, he didn't just tell this to me, he told me because I asked.

He's just a nice guy though. Yeah yeah he could be a perv or whatever but I don't think so. I've been on omegle, I can sort of tell when someone is a perv. He always tells me I'm so cute for saying things like "i'm sorry your day has been so bad, i'll try to make it a little bit better." And then I had him go and look at my tumblr and tell me if he thinks that I should change my theme or not and he says (he change his name on here to "You're the only song I want to hear"):
"You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:16:01 PM)
I like your theme lots
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:16:05 PM)
I also like your icon
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:16:10 PM)
You're really beautiful :')"

I think that's the first time a guy has ever called me beautiful, well I can't remember any other time. And it doesn't really count does it because it was through the internet. But I still appreciate it, even if he was just saying it. I don't hear compliments like that a lot.

Anyways the conversation goes on and I say thank you and I tell him that I got contacts so I don't actually wear my glasses anymore. He told me that I should put a new icon up on tumblr then, I said sure, because I was planning on doing that anyways. I tell him that he has pick which one though. So I give him the pictures that I posted up here the other day when I was going to the Harlem Globetrotters. now don't get on me for giving a stranger pictures of me, he sees me on tumblr anyways, and it's not like he knows my name, only that my first name is Molly but my tumblr URL gives that away.

Want to see what he says?:
"You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:35:00 PM)
Do number 4 as an icon
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:35:08 PM)
And fuck me you're gorgeous.
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:35:13 PM)
And you're so skinny!!!
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:35:17 PM)
I'm jealous!
molly. says: (6:35:59 PM)
Ahh thank you! And I will put up number 4 right nowww
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:36:09 PM)
Good :)
You're the only song I want to hear. says: (6:36:19 PM)
You're absolutely stunning Molly :')
molly. says: (6:36:31 PM)
ahaha, thank you so much."
Now I have to clear things up. In tumblr world people want to fuck other people all the time, it's not a big deal at all. I don't take it seriously. It means that you are really really good looking. And no, I didn't just give him pictures so he could compliment me, I wanted to know what picture to put up because I was going back and forth between a few. And the one he picked I did end up using. It made me smile a lot though.

I'm not insecure about how I look. I think I look pretty good. Lately more than before. But it stills feels so nice for someone to call you beautiful and not because they have to. When family or good friends say it, then it doesn't mean as much because you're like "yeah yeah yeah whatever." Phil Griffiths doesn't have to do that. He could just say "Pick number four" and that be it. But he says I'm stunning. It makes me feel happy.

Why though? Aren't looks not supposed to matter? Yeah they do. They do a lot. That's why I wear nice clothes and brush my hair and wear nice necklaces and put makeup on my face everyday. So there you go, call me vain for caring about how i look, call me stupid for talking to a guy on the internet, call me an idiot for listening as he compliments me, i don't care. right now i just need people to talk to and have contact with, talking to myself just isn't cutting it, and if the only person available for me to talk to is a nice guy in England, yeah I'm going to talk to him, so deal with it.

yeah i'm tired in more ways than one.