i should write a blog post.

Abby you should tell me how to make this blog more interesting because it is boring. Even though I do write songs, give you cool facts, and give you life lessons about what to do when facing a cute boy on vacation with your family.

It's 10:07pm and i should really be asleep now because i am so tired and i should start getting into the school mode but whatever.

i don't really have a plan about what to post because a lot has happened since i last posted. sort of that whole trip to seven states. Massachusetts. Connecticut. New York. New Jersey. Delaware. Maryland. Virginia. I live in MA. We passed through CT and got stuck in traffic in practically the whole state on the way home. We passed through both New York and New Jersey. My family lives in Delaware so we stayed there and did our first geocaches. We stayed at my aunt's beach condo in Ocean City, Maryland which was really nice. I like towns like that. I want to get a condo there or someplace similar that isn't seven hours away. We saw the "wild" ponies on Assateague in Virginia and my cousin and his fiancée met us there. And we were a few minutes away from Pennsylvania but we never actually went into it. That's a lot of states.

Something that sort of got me was when we were driving to the beach house from Chincoteague you could see the ferris wheel from the boardwalk (which was really cool but it would have been cooler if i wasn't there with my family and i wasn't exhuasted). and i thought about all the people on that ferris wheel. people get on and people get off. people with lives and stories and thoughts and feelings. they just get on and get off without talking to the person waiting in line next to them. we just don't even think about the people around us. we don't talk to strangers. stranger danger. but they are just people. why are we missing out on so many lives? we block ourselves out from the people around us just because that is what we are used to doing. It sucks.

When we were at the boardwalk I had my camera and I was taking pictures like a tourist. But I wanted to take pictures of the people walking by. I wanted to get their face the second they looked at me before they went on with their lives. I wanted to take a picture of them as they tried to figure out if that person was real or not because she wasn't moving. I wanted to have a picture of that family walking by. But you don't take pictures of people. Not without them noticing. They might not want their picture to be taken. People automatically act different when they see a camera. If they know it is going to be documented then they may not do something or do something they wouldn't do otherwise. What I want to do is get some sort of hidden camera and take picture of random people then put them on some sort of blog, maybe tumblr, and they share them with the world. Share all those beautiful faces. But that is probably breaking some sort of law of posting a picture of someone without their permission. But anyways.

We went to this park to do some geocaching around 7 so it was getting dark out. It was light when we got there and dark when we left. There was a concert going on. I was walking to the car to leave with Maeve and everyone else was following. Right when we got to our car there was a boy maybe around my age or a little younger was walking from the other direction with fishing poles and he stopped at the car next to us. Our eyes caught but then we just looked away pretending like we didn't see each other because that is what you do. Then my family got there and his family got there and we drove away as they loaded up their fishing stuff. I had my window down and our eyes met again but I looked away first. I wished I hadn't looked away. I wished I had kept looking at him. But I didn't. I didn't even get to see what state he was from because the trunk of his car was up so i couldn't see his license plate. but if you happened to be at Northside Park in Ocean City, Maryland on August 29th 2010 with what seemed like your mother, father, and younger sister and you have brown hair and would have been around 16 on that date - hi.

i am in a thoughtful mood but i can't pick a subject to type about. what do you want me to talk about? i really wish i could jump into the future see who is reading this and personally ask them. then i would write about what they want me to right now. but i can't. that sucks. "that sucks" is just a weird term but i still use it anyways. it's better than swearing.

really i should be sleeping now. but i can only stay up all night tonight and tomorrow and then i have to crack the whip because i have school the next day. is it weird that i already have a facebook status for Wednesday? i'll tell you what i am thinking but i could change my mind. "People keep saying that I have to go to this thing called 'school' tomorrow. What is that? And they say I'm going to be a junior but I'm too little for that." What do you think of that?

I want to talk to Danny. Or have some interaction with people I enjoy talking to. Maybe Adam Munska wouldn't hurt. Or a new kid? If there is a new boy in our class this year jeez lousie. we will have to see. ninth and tenth grade both i had a crush on the new guy and i didn't really do anything about it. which turned out to be good for me. but anyways. i can't wait for school to start. i don't think i have changed much. i always want to have the big self changing summer i haven't had it yet. maybe i never will. maybe it is just all the small experience building up to make me into the wonderful person i will be. but still it would be nice to get some recognition now. you can't force that though.

you can't force people to like you or to listen to you. you can only talk and say what you need to say (cue singing now). but i don't do that. does that make me any less of a person? i have thoughts and opinions just read the last 479 posts, 480 including this one. 20 until 500. who would have known. oh does anyone have any guesses on what day i will reach 500 posts? well seeing as school is coming up i'm going to guess Tuesday. a week from tomorrow. That means I have to post more than twice a day. okay that might be pushing it. But before Friday the 10th. By then I would have been in school for more than a week.

I am really excited to see Abby at work again. Is that weird? It's not my job but I love seeing her behind that counter with her coworkers. I think that is half of the fun of a job (or the only fun) - the coworkers. you get to meet these people you wouldn't otherwise and you create a sort of bond because you are working together. it's different then going to school with a person because you both have a job to do. you get to know each other in a different way. that is one of the reasons why i would want a job. if not the main reason. forget the money, i just want to have some coworkers. that's weird too.

now i am running out of things to say. for now. i am sure tomorrow i will have another couple hundred words to say.

i want to do this

i think i good life skill is learning when to keep your mouth shut and when to say something. it's just a very good skill to have.

i should put together a book or something with advice. oooh. you know that sketchbook i am supposed to be making that i haven't started? maybe i can include advice. i don't know. we will see where that goes. maybe tomorrow since i will be home all day tomorrow.

i'm the only one downstairs. everyone else went to bed. they aren't asleep yet but they are you know going to bed. i'm not. i want to treasure the last night where i will really be able to stay up late without worrying about it.

i've always wanted a transformation. like maybe if i looked different i would act different then people would treat me differently. that's true though isn't it? people treat you different and look at you differently depending on how you look. but i don't know anyone to give me a makeover. maybe contacts would be a start but i'm afraid that i look better with glasses than without them. but i don't know. why do looks matter so much?

i'm starting to feel tired now. the lack of sleep is starting to affect me. or is it effect me? i don't care enough to look it up.

i wonder what is happening somewhere else right now. i wonder what some other 16 year old girl somewhere else is thinking. i wonder. but i do not know.

OMG. i just realized i haven't seen Taylor Swift's new music video for Mine. what kind of fan am I? come on come on loaddddd. black screen, spinning ball of doom. YES! i just had to pause the movie to write that yes now i am going to go and watch it. ahh so excited. that was wonderful. i enjoy all the guys in Taylor Swift's music videos, Lucas Till? i mean come on, Taylor has good taste. it was kind of funny watching Taylor Swift with this children that were supposed to be her children when she looked so young. oh wait. some people that young do have children. but still. it was a good music video.

maybe now i should go to sleep. let me watch the You Belong With Me music video because that is still my favorite then i will. watched it. i still love that music video so much. Lucas Till's expression when he holds up his notepad with the little note on it. i love it so much. i was going to say that i don't like how she has to take off her glasses and put on some makeup and a dress to get him to notice her but he already had the paper that said "I love you." so that means he loved her before the dance. good thing there. but Taylor Swift is so gorgeous and so talented and so wonderful. i like her a lot. and now i am going to go to bed. i'll probably bring my ipod upstairs with me and watch that music video again. night.

edit: it is 11:13pm right now and i just finished that post. it took me about an hour of writing pretty much the whole time. yeahhhh welcome home!