hi. so guess what i am going to talk about. yep you guessed right, taylor mathews.

he had a live chat today. i tried to help him out but anyways it ended up working. and honestly it is crazy how far he has come. 6 months, or around that time, ago he had a chat and there were like 9 people there. now there are 200. so proud. but in another 6 months let's make the 2,000. i'm serious though. i'm ready for Taylor to get big and for all of my facebook friends to be like "IS THAT TAYLOR MATHEWS IN YOUR PROFILE PICTURE" and i will be like, "yes, yes it is, i'm glad you are just now realizing how amazing he is"

but it was strange, he started talking about the Give It A Try fan video that I put it together and it made it sound like Megan put it together, which she didn't, I did. so that was frustrating. but then Megan Zella corrected him. and he was like oh yeah and tried to play it off all cool like, but before that my mom had texted him. so he texted her back after being like "i just meant that she was there" blah blah blah. whatever. it did make me sad. but i'm getting over it. but i am looking to see why he brought it up in the first place and i can't find any tweet where anyone mentions it around when he brought it up even though it sounded like he responded to a tweet. and he probably has moved on and forgotten about it already but here i am looking through the tweets trying to see why he brought it up. but anyways. it's cool. i am going to be like Tay and try to move on.

oh and by the way now there has been talk about going to the listening party. my mom is like anything can happen. and i'm like ummm no. we have to stop. we are already spending almost 60,000 a year on my college tuition  plus the couple grand for me to go to China. and then Maeve is going to Spain next year. and you know you are going to give a bunch to the kickstarter anyways. and you gave a bunch last time. and you paid for all of those R5 & TM VIPs and tickets. we do not have money to spend on plane tickets to Cali and to spend on a vacation in LA. so unless we get rich. or somehow this divorce thing gives you money instead of wasting it all on attorneys. or we hit the lottery. we are not going to california for the listening party.

watch now we will go. but seriously. how can we just spend all of this money without worrying about it. ummmm. Yankee isn't that big of a company. and now Mommy might not get any more money from Yankee. i don't know how that divorce thing is going.

umm i was going to talk about how it is hard to be a fan. but honestly i'm just over it. what i really need in my life is a cute guy for me to have a crush on that isn't a celebrity touring, a guy that lives near me. so that way i can stop thinking about TM and everyone from the loud tour every two seconds. haaa we will see if that will happen though. maybe i'll find myself a cute chinese boy...oh wait, i need someone who lives here....whatever, i'll have more of a chance with him than thinking about this popular boys, not that i want to really date Taylor. did i say that before? i could not handle dating Taylor, he is all over the place. i just want attention from him and i want him to like me and i want him to think that i'm special. that's all. but that's difficult when you are one of 10,000 fans and you live all the way across the country. working on it though. but until then i think i'm going to sleep. then tomorrow i have to get my car from the mechanics, go to the eye doctors, and then deal with the dad because tomorrow's dad's day. whoop.