i can't wait to go back to school so i can have a life again. at home my life currently consists of sitting around and staring at a computer screen. recently i have learned to make gifs so i have been making gifs of Taylor Mathews to put on my blog to help support him. i feel like a creep and a stalker and i really need better things to do to fill my time. maybe i should hang out with friends. oh right, what friends? my friends are three to eleven hours by plane away. oh my boyfriend you ask? i don't really feel like going over his house so we can just slam lips and try to avoid crying and awkward or deep conversation. seriously, it is easier to just shut off my mind and not think about everything that isn't working and just make out with him. don't get me wrong, making out is fun and all, but not enough to motivate me to leave my comfy house with my internet, tv, and family. i know, i was just complaining about how i need a life and now i don't want to go over Josh's. ahhh i'm just tired of going over there and just making out. it honestly seems like we are just prolonging the inevitable. i feel like my mom. unfeeling, pushing away. that's what helped break up their marriage. but i know this is different. blah.