a lot has been happening but at the same time not that much.

i went to church. but it was different then the traditional church that i went to. this had a big rock band and everyone was singing along and putting their hands and arms up to the sky. and then it was just one person talking and sort of telling a story. and then the band came back for the end. they wanted everyone to stand up and to raise their arms and it was interesting. they still collected money like a church. but the way they talked about everything was the same sort of understanding i came to have. wait let me back up. okay i was forced to go to church and CCD while i was young until my mom didn't make me go anymore because i hated it. but i come to my own sort of relationship and understanding with God and my own beliefs. it was still weird to be in church and i felt kind of out of place because i wasn't as "into it" as everyone else was. i honestly hadn't thought about God for a while. but i enjoyed it and i want to go back. it made me start thinking.

but then girl's night...last week it was game night, this night it was talking about demons and angels and signs and miracles and such. and it was amazing what they said. i believe those girls because there is no way they would lie about that stuff. it was so amazing and you can see why they believe so wholeheartedly. but i guess it is harder for me to have as much trust and faith. but when we were praying they said such amazing things about me and they are really good people. Maghan asked for my number and then today just randomly texted me asking how my day was going. like that is how nice. but it was a good place for me to be in, surrounded by those good vibes and thought provoking. that's what this trip is for, for me to think and learn more about myself. and my faith is part of that. i was going to go to church again next tuesday but now megan and liz are performing at belcourt taps and i really want to go because i have been there before and i really liked it. and megan and liz are awesome. i just have to find someone to go with me. i think i will ask Maghan first and then if she can't then i'll ask Zach. and if he can't go, then i'm not sure who i will go with. maybe Summer, i mentioned it to her but she was thinking about trying out that church and i think she will be with her boyfriend. well i'll figure it out anyways.

what else. oh i had a job interview at Nashville Shores today which is a waterpark. i would be in retail selling food. which is kind of a really sucky job, but i would be making money and i would be doing something and i would meeting people. which i need to do. like tomorrow i have no idea what i'm doing. i have to find some place to go or something to do. but i am not sure exactly how the interview went because it was a group interview and kind of awkward. i mean i did fine, but i'm not sure if i stood out enough to get the job. and what kind of person would i be if i can't even get a job at a waterpark. actually i would be fine, i probably will hate it anyways, or not. it would be nice to get it but if i don't that will be okay, hopefully i'll find something better. i just hope they tell me soon so i know if i should keep looking for something else or not.

umm today i went to dinner with a bunch of people and then to a movie with Summer. i'm starting to loosen up around Summer and Kristian which is good. because once i feel comfortable with a few people, i'm pretty much comfortable all around and i'm just myself.

oh but i finally met the fourth roommate, or i guess third, Erin. she seems kind of negative and Summer and Kristian don't always like talking to her and seem to try to avoid her almost because they are afraid of her. but it's funny because all of them are talking about how this place doesn't seem like a home and how they never want to come back because there is bad energy and everyone just goes to their room and shuts the door and there is stuff from the landlady everywhere and how they don't communicate - but to me this already feels like a home. i settled in pretty well. i like being here. i don't mind being alone. i actually like that better sometimes. i get along when Summer and Kristian are home now. i haven't had a chance to figure out Erin yet so i am just sort of avoiding her, which is okay. we will see how that works. but all of them are moving out at the end of their lease. actually Kristian is moving out sooner because she doesn't have the money and the whole not feeling like a home thing and how she doesn't want to just come home and go to her room, she wants it to feel like a home and to talk to her roommates and all. i guess i'm used to dorm life where your bedroom is your home so i like it. but i will miss her a lot and i'm sad she is leaving soon. she is so amazing. she might be getting married soon too. i don't want to go into everything about her life now. i just hope she does what is best for her. she is so amazing and i am so lucky i was able to meet her and get to know her. she apologized and they all felt bad for me coming into this mess - but i am honestly so lucky and thankful and grateful and appreciative that i am here. i wouldn't really want to be anywhere else. Summer and Kristian are amazing and maybe Erin is too, i just haven't gotten to know her yet. but i am very thankful for them. and i really like this house, i mean they have been here for around 3 years so maybe after that amount of time, i wouldn't like it either and would be ready for a change. but i just hope and wish the best for them because they are awesome women.

okay i think that is all i'm going to talk about today. i can talk about internship stuff later and all. thanks.