Yesterday was the first time that college really hit me and I cried. like full out cried. well quietly because i didn't really want anyone to hear. why? because josh didn't get accepted to northeastern. which leaves him one chance that he will go to school near me. boston university. i really really really hope he does. because if he doesn't then that leaves us in the long distance relationship yucky stuff. josh is all optimistic and thinks it will work. i'm scared he'll get tired of driving two hours to come see me. or he'll meet someone at college he'll rather spend his time with. and i just won't be able to see him everyday and he'll fall out of love with me. he doesn't believe any of this will happen, he says distance makes the heart grows fonder, and usually driving back to and forth to school in a week already he drives 5 hours, so driving 4 hours to come see me once a week is no big deal. and he says i'm molly so there is no one else he would want to spend time with. i think he'll be all gung-ho like that for the first month or two but then grow tired of it. he says i should stop worrying about him just growing tired of me and dropping him. but i've had so many friends just drop me and decide they don't want to be friends me with, so what's one more?

i just really hope BU isn't stupid.