(this never got published before, it should be before the previous post)

hi I have a lot of thoughts and feelings but I am not sure what to write about. I feel like you miss out on a lot in my life so you don't get the full picture by reading this. but I guess that is life, you never get the full picture of anyone but yourself. i'm going to go catch up on what I have written about in case I need to add on to anything.

omg I've barely posted since school started but I feel like so much has happened.

between the stupid hackathon, which I don't want to write about and would rather just forget.

dealing with living with Ellie and that whole friendship.

babysitting and dogsitting like crazy.

Roxy and her boyfriend.

all of my classes, and doing a play. the classes I like and the classes I don't like.

how content I am that there are no boys in my life.

I think I overall i'm happy though. daily I tiptoe around and deal with Ellie. I have to deal with classes and that work. jobs and all of that is always in the back of my mind. trying to be a good friend and make new friends. and being a good daughter/sister and staying in touch with them.

I was just home last weekend and again had such a hard time living. I was miserable all day. and I was crying so hard when I was leaving. I was also sick, I had a cold, so maybe that was part of it. but by the time I got to babson I was fine and back at it.

I just video chatted with Kristen. I miss her so much, I wish she was here. it's crazy to think a year ago we were in Shanghai. ahhh. okay I think I should go to bed.

crying.

I have a stupid science midterm tomorrow that I don't know anything for because we have to know so much and I don't know anything so I know i'm going to do poorly

and then I messed up something for fme, I just jumped the gun because I wanted to get something done when I really should have just waited. and now it came back to bite me in the butt. and it's stupid.

and i'm overtired. and I just feel like shit. and I don't want to do anything.

this is such a rough week for me. I didn't even see it coming.

I just want someone I can rant to and talk to about all of this without them judging or comparing my life to theirs.

deep breath. okay here is the plan molly. after you are done with this you are going to get ready for bed. then you are going to go to sleep. tomorrow morning you will put on your favorite sweater and jeans. then you will go to fme and deal with professor vroman and apologize for your mistake. you will try to look over some science stuff while you are in fme. and then you will take your science midterm and you will do the best you can. and then it will be over. and then you will go to media studies. and after media studies you will grab some food. and then you will go babysit. after babysitting you will get dinner. and then you will finish your business and drama paper and you will do research for your entertainment law paper. and then you will cut stupid paper for professor sokuvitz. then you will go to bed. then the next morning you will wake up and you will finish cutting paper and you will write warm and fuzzies for the first years. and then you will do errands if you have time. and then you will go to business and drama and then entertainment law. and then you will breathe. and then you will get some food. and then you will do science research or the science lab. and then you will have dinner. and then you will do the fme review session. and then you will do science research or the science lab. then maybe you will go to Karla's suite. and then you will sleep. and then you will go to the fme exam. then you will drive Amelie. and then you will either go to your science meeting then babysit, or you will try to get out of the science meeting and meet Maeve and Auntie Julie for lunch and then hang out with Maeve and her friends for the day.

but I really don't want to do any of that. I just want to curl up in my bed and stay here forever. but I guess that is life and being an adult. it sucks.

okay so an idea just popped into my head and I need to flesh it out a bit.

okay so every time a fan engages with you on facebook, twitter, instagram: aka follows you. they get a message. a message invites you to join "the fan club" which basically is just them entering their info. the main info we would want: name, age (birthday), location (zipcode), twitter/instagram/facebook, email

then we would have a profile for every fan. so we can target emails/messages at them. when it is their birthday they can get a special message from us. when there is something major happening in their city, they can get a message: whether that is us performing or just some news worthy event to show we are thinking about them.

you can also send a follow up longer option survey to everyone part of the club. this could have fun questions like what is your favorite color? and favorite candy? maybe even ask their mailing address. so that way you can surprise them by always sending emails in their favorite color. or randomly sending them small surprises. and you can ask them market survey questions too. like what do you think of this song? how likely are you to buy this merch for this amount?

you could even incorporate a point system into the survey thing. but just get as much information from your fans so they are just not a number. but this is something that one artist could do with the help of some interns. minus if you actually mail them anything, this wouldn't cost any money, just time. but think about how devoted the fans would be when everything is tailored to them and how special they would feel.

then if there was a way to make this so it could be streamlined and easily used for every artist. there is a business within itself. manage their email/social media messaging to the fans and keep a database of all their fans.